My Ugly Savior

My Ugly Savior

He had no beauty or majesty to attract us to him,

nothing in his appearance that we should desire him. (Isaiah 53:2)

In a world where we have christian celebrities and dynamic, attractive preachers, I think this verse becomes significant. What draws people to our message? Is it our attractiveness, or are we attractive because of his presence in us? It reminds me of a story from the Brush Arbor meetings in Kentucky - one Methodist preacher became famous for the powerful sermons and manifestations that followed his preaching, but the other extraordinary feature about this preacher was that he was, "just about the ugliest man you had ever laid eyes on."

Not to say we shouldn't be well groomed or present ourselves as best as we can, but the question is what do we put our confidence in? Are we confident because we look good: or do we lack confidence because we feel we don't look good enough? In the end what does it matter? It's the anointing of God and his presence in our lives that makes us the most attractive.

It's difficult to imagine that Jesus may not have been attractive. The more I know of him the more lovely he becomes. When artists paint him or when visions are seen he is always beautiful. But what else could he be? To know him is to love him. To love him is to be attracted to him in such a powerful way that we cannot help but portray him as beautiful.

Isn't it just like God to come to earth as an average (even below average?) looking man? God rarely works within the systems that our world has created. God always turns our systems upside-down. There was nothing in the natural that would attract us to him. It was his divinity and supernatural anointing that drew the world to him. How awesome that as he walked the earth people were drawn to him because of what poured out of him. He was the resurrection and the life, the bright and beautiful morning star. Those who were religious were repelled by him, but those who recognized their need for a savior couldn't stay away. 

One day I shall see him face to face - I will know as I am known. On that day I shall see him as he is, and I have no doubt that when I see him he will be beautiful. From this side of the cross he could be nothing but beautiful. 

Happy Easter -

Consider this my two cents regarding the latest Internet phenomenon that says Easter is really based upon a Babylonian goddess named "Ishtar" - the goddess of fertility whose symbols are eggs and bunnies. 

Since turning my life over to Christ in 1990, I've witnessed many bans and boycotts. From Disney, Halloween, to Santa Claus and Christmas and then Easter (the first campaign, not the most recent.) I use to jump on some of these “ban” wagons, I felt duped, I had long been ignorant of too many pagan/worldly agendas. But then I noticed that many Christians who led and participated in these campaigns felt more passionate about their causes than they did about the cause of Christ to save a lost and dying world. It seemed like a bit of a double standard. I backed away and came to terms in my own heart. Many Christian campaigns put a wall between me, and the people in the world that God loves.

That year I started deliberately giving candy to the kids who came to my porch on Halloween, I bought a Mickey Mouse watch, I helped my Mother build her Santa Claus collection and I celebrate Christmas (even though I know Jesus wasn't born on December 25th.) I try and put Christ in the center of everything in hopes that the world might see Christ in me. I left all the info-maniacs to fend for them selves. When Christ becomes the center he easily trumps all other pagan symbols and gods.  

            

Easter falls near Passover ... Christ was crucified on Passover. This year, 2013, Passover began March 25th and Ends April 2nd. All throughout history we can trace Easter and find it occurs on or around Passover. Coincidently In the northern hemisphere Easter is celebrated in early spring. I like the fact that Easter falls in the spring because the whole earth is resurrecting from a wintery grave. Even the animals know it is time to reproduce. Spring is a time of new life and fruitfulness. The resurrection power of Christ made my life new and fruitful.

            

I used the Daily Beast as my source to do some research. I purposely chose a non-Christian source because I didn’t want to be subjected to the biases that unconsciously occur when articles are written. This is a segment from Megan Mcardle’s article.

“ ... Easter is an English word.  The Greeks and Romans called it Pascha, which is why Easter is Pasqua in Italian, Pascua in Spanish, and Paques in French.  How exactly did the name of a Canaanite fertility goddess skip all the way to England from the Middle East without stopping in Rome or Byzantium? Ishtar was the goddess of love, war and sex… 

Ishtar was associated with fertility and sex. However, her symbols were the lion, the gate and the eight-pointed star; I can't find any evidence of eggs or rabbits symbolically belonging to her. And Easter has nothing to do with her.

Most scholars believe that Easter gets its name from Eostre or Ostara, a Germanic pagan goddess. English and German are two of the very few languages that use some variation of the word Easter (or in German, Ostern)... Most other European languages use one form or another of the Latin name for Easter, Pascha, ... derived from the Hebrew Pesach, meaning Passover."

Which is it? A Babylonian pagan goddess or a Germanic one? And what about the word in other languages, the ones that don't use a derivation of 'Ishtar?' Does anyone get why this bugs me yet? The true gospel message is consistent in every culture and every language. It is consistent in every hemisphere whether it is springtime, or not. These other “ban” wagons are distractions from the true message.

The bottom line for me is that we must resist being sidetracked from the true focus of the Christian message. I am Christian because Jesus Christ the Passover lamb died for my sins and ransomed my life from the grave. There is no greater message in the world than the redeeming message of God’s Love. “He loved me (and the rest of the world) while we were still sinners." Pagans - Hedonist - Communist. 

May the Spirit of Jesus Christ Rise up in his church!

Happy Easter!

Stump Growth

I recently watched a news story about a project that endeavors to save the amazing Redwood and Sequoia trees for the future. If you've ever driven through the national parks that are home to these trees you cannot help but appreciate the vision of the founder, David Milarch.

In the NBC news clip, the reporter stood in front of a stump that was thirty feet across. The one hundred and thirty year old stump had once been the foundation to a tree that was 'forty stories tall'. Today around the base of the seemingly dead stump, fresh green sprigs grow. The "stump growth" is harvested and taken to the lab, and from this they (clone) and plant new trees.

I know nothing of the man behind the science, or the organization, Archangel, Ancient Tree Archive. But I appreciate their futuristic vision. Long after this generation is gone, another generation will appreciate the fruits of their labor.

In the kingdom of God much of what we are called to do is for the next generation. For them to benefit from the fruit of our vision, we must have hope for the future. We cannot allow the dark clouds of information to obscure our vision. We must hold tightly to 'the substance of things hoped for.' These fast growing Redwood seedlings are the substance of things hoped for.

Life can cut us down and all that is left of our dreams are stumps, but that does not have to be the end. Because God can bring life back to that which has died.

http://www.corbisimages.com

Even in the ancient book of Job we find the same wisdom:

"For there is hope for a tree,
When it is cut down, that it will sprout again,
And its shoots will not fail.
"Though its roots grow old in the ground
And its stump dies in the dry soil,
At the scent of water it will flourish
And put forth sprigs like a plant (14:7-9)


At the very scent of water there will be new growth. Have your dreams died? Do you feel as though everything has been cut down, and all that is left is a stump? Lift up your head, look to the One who is the living water.

He is the one who repairs, restores and resurrects. "A bruised reed he will not break, and a smoldering wick he will not snuff out. In faithfulness he will bring forth justice..." (Isaiah 42:3) 

Imagine! The One who conceived of the Redwood and the Sequoia tree; the God of the universe and endless galaxies desires to breathe new life into us. He makes all things new. May His fountains flow over those who have lost hope - may what seems as a lifeless stump flourish into new growth! For the sake of the earth and the next generation. For the sake of His Glory, or as Bach might write, "Soli Deo gloria."

The Beauty of the Desert

There is a Psalm that is well marked on the pages of my Bible. Each time I read it, I mark it for emphasis. The ink has begun to bleed through to the other side. 

It reveals the despair and hopelessness of a worshiper. One who had known the joy of His Presence as worshippers were led into the house of the Lord. It is a Psalm of desperation, and yet it shows hope ... I will not give up! I will praise Him! 

I will put on a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. The oil of joy instead of mourning, and a crown of beauty instead of ashes. (Isaiah 61)

The success of a blog is dependent upon the consistency of the blogger. Though the last four months have uncovered a storm of words. It seems none have made it beyond the pages of my journal or the margins of my Bible. 

My Soul longs for God - the Living God. May he rain down on me ... may he reign in me.

As a deer longs for streams of water,
so I long for You, God.
I thirst for God, the living God.
When can I come and appear before God?

My tears have been my food day and night,
while all day long people say to me,
"Where is your God?"

I remember this as I pour out my heart:
how I walked with many,
leading the festive processions to the house of God,
with joyful and thankful shouts.

Why am I depressed?
Why this turmoil within me?
Put your hope in God, I will still praise Him,
My savior and my God.  Psalm 42:1-5 (HCSB)

It is in the dry places that we grow thirsty. Our heavenly bridegroom allures and leads us to the desert. And it is in the desert where he speaks tenderly to us. He restores our vineyards, and causes the places of defeat to become a door of hope. It is in the desert that our songs are restored. (Hosea 2:14-17)

"...joy comes in the morning." Psalm 30:5

A Harvest of Joy: 

a mother/daughter memoir 

Due out March 2013

Life's "If Nots"

A few weeks ago, I finished reading the book, “Aggie: a girl without a country.” I had read it many years ago, but the recent reading affected me in a profound way. The first time I was inspired and awed by the story of a little Norwegian baby who was left orphaned in the Belgian Congo by her missionary father. He left the country a widower, bitter and faithless.  

Recently as I read the book,  I thought of several friends whose faith has failed. They were my peers: pastors, missionaries and lay ministers. When they reached midlife, it seems their theology fell apart, and they abandoned the very faith they had built their lives upon.

I can relate to disillusion and anger we feel in life. I lived with the deep undercurrent of frustration for many years. While my friends were all in Bible School, I spent most of my young adult years angry with God and the church. I had no interest in its seemingly empty creeds and doctrines. I explored the world’s alternatives and pleasures, and in the end they left me bankrupt. I decided I'd rather live this life, its pleasure and pain, with Christ rather than without Him. 

I’m grateful for the book I read soon after I made that commitment. I was living in Texas, and for my thirtieth birthday I took myself on a personal retreat. It was in a tent near Fredericksburg, Texas that I read Oswald Chamber’s book, “Baffled to Fight Better” – a study on the life of Job.

The words that stuck with me most was the quote, “Job had an implicit hold on God, not an explicit hold on God.” When all of Job’s pre-conceived ideas and creeds fell apart, he never lost faith. For a lifetime Job had been faithful and true, yet his world still fell apart. In the midst of the storms, he made bold declaration. “The Lord gives and the Lord takes away - Blessed be the name of the Lord.” “Though he slay me, I will serve him.” While his friends quoted creeds and theologies, Job held on to the only truth he knew, “I know my redeemer lives.” *

As I observe the lives of friends who have abandoned their ministries and faith, I think perhaps they too lost their explicit hold on God. When life and theologies no longer made sense, all they could do was drop out of the battle. Perhaps their struggle was for a kingdom and not the King. I do not think this is the end of their stories. Every day I pray they will have a face-to-face encounter with their King 'who is the lifter of their heads.' *

I want my faith to be strong enough to handle the "if nots." As the three Israelite boys in the book of Daniel said. “Our God is able to save us, but if not, we still will not bow down.” As the apostle Paul said, “I want to know him, the power of his resurrection and the fellowship of his suffering.” I refuse to ask for one and hope to be exempt from the other.

May we be so baffled by His presence that we will fight better. "May His Kingdom come and His will be done on earth as it is in heaven." 

* Job 1:21, Job 13:15, Job 19:25  -- * Psalm 3:3

All that's Left

The sky is falling, or so they say

Those pundits who pontificate

Today it fell, and

Beyond the sky was

A kingdom with no end

Today, the earth shook,

It crumbled beneath my feet

Beneath this terra not so firma

I found a Rock – a Cornerstone

No thing on earth compares

When the fabric of life

Unravels, I discovered a

Thread that has carried me along

He’s more than a verse

Or even a song

He’s all that’s right

In a world gone wrong.

When all life’s an illusion

A ridiculous sham!

He remains
the great

I AM

Cathedrals of the World

Melk Abbey Austria ©

Once we travelled the rails and snaked our way high into the Swiss Alps to Andermatt. On our way back to the station we found a small church with huge wooden doors. Together my husband and I sat in the holy hush of candle light; surrounded by murals and sculptures from another time. I imagined the workers who built this haven so high on the rocky peaks.

I have walked cobbled stoned paths in Israel, Austria, Germany and Pompeii. I've bathed in light that danced its way through a million stained shards of glass, and rested in the splendor of places with domes covered in gold. I've watched the tourists with their careless cameras disrupt the faithful few. And listened to the walls hoping to hear the prayers of a thousand years. I eavesdropped once, though the language I did not know, to the prayer of one broken heart. Once I found an empty space, and risked singing an anthem of praise just to hear it echo off the ancient stones. When the tour ended, I filed out in hallowed silence, though my heart hungered for more.

But there's a faraway place that I hold so dear. A place that fills my heart with unspeakable delight. It has been the most magnificent cathedral of all. The artistry and worship were more than my senses could bare. No murals crowded my view of the sky, the walls were mud, but draped in vibrant cloth. I hold this place close to my heart, and think of it when the difficult days come (and trust me they do). 

The rhythm of their praise still echoes in my ear -- These were the songs of joy Christ must have heard as he endured the cross. Every tribe and tongue singing praises to their King. -- I remember that place and the sounds of their song. 

I remember their smiles and the way the children danced. The dust covered faces and ragged clothes. Nowhere near were there domes of gold. 

"Blessed are the poor in Spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of God" Matthew 5:3

Fickle Hearts

I'm so glad God has used earthly relationship to explain His love for us. He uses all of the earthly examples, A father, a mother, a brother, a friend, a lover and an eternal bridegroom.

My husband and I are in our eighth year of marriage - I lift my glass, or tip my hat (whichever you prefer) to those who are decades ahead of us in your matrimonial journey. 

Trinity Church 2004

In our few short years, one of the more important lessons I have learned is you fall in love with the person you thought they were, but you grow to love (and commit to love) them for the person they really are. "I love you, not for who I thought you were, or for who I need you to be, but I love you for who you are."

Unless we go into marriage with this type of commitment then we may have the tendency to bail.

The same is true with our relationship with God. Often times we go into this relationship because of who we think He is. And when He fails to meet our expectations, we have a tendency to bail, rather than stay in the relationship and love Him for who he is.

In our brokenness, we form the objects of our love into who we need them to be. It's what we do with each other, and it is what we do with God, but He refuses to fit into the molds we've created for Him. If He did, He would be enabling our idolatrous natures. Ultimately what God desires to do is to heal our brokenness. He alone can heal the voids and wounds of our hearts. His love is greater than any earthly example: He loves with perfection. Until we can love Him for who He is, we love with the selfishness of a child. 

Whether in our earthly relationships, or with the One who knows us better than we know ourselves, the greatest reward is to allow love to become a selfless offering, so that we might know and be known. 

1 Corinthians 13:12 - "For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known."

The Windows of our Heart

The Windows of our Heart

I love to imagine the scene from 2 Samuel 6 as it describes King David bringing the ark of the covenant - God's presence - into Jerusalem. They escorted the ark with shout of joy and praise, and David danced before the presence of the Lord.

Melk Abbey © TLW

In verse sixteen it reads, "Michal, the daughter of Saul looked out the window, and saw king David leaping and dancing before God; and she despised him in her heart." She despised his exuberant and expressive worship before the presence of Jehovah, the covenant keeping God. David danced before the One who had been faithful to keep his promises to a shepherd boy. He knew the One he danced for. But Michal was so far removed from God's presence that all she could do was criticize and despise.

The part of the chapter than stands out the most, is verse eighteen and twenty. In verse eighteen we read that David offered up a burnt offerings, and blessed the people; in verse twenty he went home to bless his household. Instead he was greeted by a critical wife, she attacked him with her words.

Her critical spirit caused her to miss the blessing; she remained barren for the rest of her days. 

My prayer is that I will never be so removed from God's presence that I cannot rejoice with those who rejoice. And may I never allow criticisms to deprive me of the blessings. Lord, defined my life with fruitfulness and not barrenness! 

Vito has Died

Vito died this morning.

He’s my husband’s barber – he just cut my husbands hair two weeks ago. He’s old fashion in that he used scissors and not electric clippers… I’ve always imagined him being a bit like Edward Scissor Hands as he cuts:

He was an Italian. I bet you didn’t guess that … short in stature, dark hair, and a believer in Jesus Christ. But he wasn’t a church going believer – he dropped out of church long ago. Something about it left a bad taste in his mouth.

But his faith was real. He kept original artwork in his barbershop. You could see it through the window, just past the revolving red, white and blue barber post. The artist’s name is Gaetano – he didn’t know he could paint till he was put in prison.

Gaetano Milano ©

Long ago, Gaetano was one of Vito’s clients, and Vito always spoke to him about Jesus. But Gaetano wasn’t interested; he had other things on his mind. That is until he got put in prison for being the trigger guy in a Mafia murder.

It was while he was in solitary confinement that Gaetano shouted out to Vito’s God. In his desperation, he wanted to see what Jesus had to offer. After he was released from solitary, he discovered he could paint. He’s been prolific. Most of his paintings are centered around the theme of Christ and the Cross.

One month ago, Gaetano was released from prison after more than twenty years. Vito travelled south to celebrate the day with his friend.

Today Vito died. He was released from this prison of this world …

Those who remain will miss him – his family, his clients. But to be absent from this body, is to be present with the Lord. He has entered a place of rest, a place where there are no tears or pain.

My Husband's Heart

Durnstein, Austria 2010 © 

My Husbands Heart

My husband had an echocardiogram this morning. Sound waves echoed through the chambers of his heart -- I wonder if it picked up the echoes of the praise that pours from his mouth. 

I imagine the tech may have heard tunes of Worthy is the Lamb, or Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing ...  

We could have saved everyone the time and money. You see, all is well within the chambers of this man's heart.

There may be a few physical aberrations in his physical heart - but with the heart that beats eternal -- all is well. 

 "Grow a wise heart —you'll do yourself a favor; keep a clear head—you'll find a good life."

                

       

Yellow Labs - God's Glory

I take a lot of pictures of my dog as she sleeps. I try in vain to capture her contentment with each snap. She can follow me into a room, and within seconds she will find the perfect spot and close her eyes. I've often accused her of faking it - "You can't be asleep ... no way." She is stoic, not even a flicker of the lids... Well, sometime.

Oswald Chamber's is quoted to have said. 'The Blue Jay honors God by just being a Blue Jay.'

My paraphrase is that the Yellow Labrador honors God by just being a Yellow Labrador.

Each day she effortlessly glorifies God by being exactly what He created her to be

My prayer is that I might learn to do the same: 

Delight myself in God in such a way that He will be delighted.

Opening my eyes ...

Warning: If you ask for God to show you how the work of repentance looks, perhaps you should add this disclaimer - God show me, but please don't ask me to listen to Jackie Pullinger describe the work that she has done among the poor and destitute in Hong Kong. 

If you want God to reveal the sin in your heart... you may not be able to bear what he reveals... 


It is much easier to repent from obvious sins of passion rather than the hidden sins of the heart. But, then again "God desires truth in the innermost parts."


Our heart is hard. Our eyes are blind and we are poor and deaf... 


God help us ... 

61 Isaiah 61:1-2

The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is upon me,
    for the Lord has anointed me
    to bring good news to the poor.
He has sent me to comfort the brokenhearted
    and to proclaim that captives will be released
    and prisoners will be freed.
² He has sent me to tell those who mourn
    that the time of the Lord’s favor has come.




"For you always have the poor with you; but you do not always have Me..."     Jesus